I have not posted here in about 6 months (maybe more) and it is a complete shame. I HAVE been running, I have done a few races actually. However, I would be greatly remiss if I told you I was keeping up with it in the manner I should have for the entirety of this separation. Allow me to summarize:
Kinsale St. Patrick’s Day 4 Miler: March 14th, 2015
I ran this one with my brother. I should say that “with” is a loose term. My brother smoked my 12 minute mile (usually) pace, clocking an impressive 32 minutes for the four mile course. This was my first race back at it after the winter lull in which I did not train as much as I wanted to (negative temperatures were just not my thing).
I also learned a valuable lesson: I am not an evening runner. I did poorly for a number of reasons. Chiefly: I wasn’t well-trained enough. I did not end in last place, but I did not do as well as I would have liked. In addition to this I learned that I am not providing my body with the things it needs to do the job right. I did not eat well and I did not properly hydrate throughout that day. It was a recipe for disaster, but I did at least learn something.
*BONUS*
The next morning I got up to run a couple miles and fell. I truly ate dirt. Luckily it was at the end of my run and near enough to my house that I did not have to hobble far.
Lady Tutu 5K: March 28th, 2015
Let it never be said that I do not enjoy a good tutu, my husband on the other hand was so happy to see this leave the dining room-ahem, my workstation- for good. It had glitter tulle in it and I loved it.
This race was wonderful for a number of reasons. It was unseasonably cold, which actually ended up not being too bad. I got to run it with my best friend, her first 5k, and having never run with a friend before I must say it was really very fun. I hit a PR and felt amazing after it was all said and done. We then went to waffle house and I demolished one hell of a breakfast.
After this I got to have a nap. If any of you out there have kids, you know this is a rarity. I was cold to the bone and I had plans with my other best friend that evening and I NEEDED a nap. I was happy for the hour I got.
The Lull From Lady Tutu all the way until school let out:
I usually do not like to discuss personal matters, but lately I have been reading a lot about people who find comfort knowing others are going through the same thing as them. After those races I was riding on a serious high, but then I crashed. The end of the school year was upon me, there was a lot to be done to finish up novels and make sure all standards were covered. Sometimes it felt like the world was shrinking in on me. My anxiety peaked and panic attacks became frequent. I knew that running would help to balance me out, but there just did not seem to be enough hours in the day. I also turned to food to comfort me, even if I was not fully aware of it at the time. My husband, who joined Title Boxing club, lost 65 pounds and while I was so very proud of him I was also intensely jealous. I always maintain that I do not run for weight-loss as much as mental well-being, but it was hard to have done something for so long and counted every calorie and cut out everything “bad” (prior to the breakdown I seemed to have found myself in) to lose barely 10 lbs. It was just the last, albeit superficial, straw. I then stopped counting calories, which in addition to stopping running caused me to tack back on those 10 lbs.
This was one of the many quotes I found that I started to look at religiously. “Little Inspirations” as I called them, helped me breathe a little easier and know that eventually I would come out on the other side.
But then…
The year started to come to a close. I finished up the last of my RESA tasks (it is a nightmare, I cannot even begin to tell you), the retiring librarian donated an entire book shelf worth of books to my class library, and I started making plans to get my rear back in gear. I began to breathe easier.
The Candy Race: June 20th, 2015
Can you tell that it was raining and freaking horrible? That lovely lady to my left (your right), the one without a small child attached to their body? That is my sister. It was exciting to run a race “with” my sister. I say with loosely here because, once again despite my training I was beaten by my sibling. This time though, it was not so bad. Actually, we probably would have ended together had I not had a cramp in the middle of mile 1, causing me to pretty much limp/walk for a majority of the race. Let that be a lesson folks, STRETCH!!! I couldn’t get my husband out of the house that day, and so by the time we got on the road, I was left with only 10 minutes to stretch before running in the pouring rain. It did not go well. This was the worst time I have ever done. As a matter of fact, I clocked the same distance about 12 minutes faster just two days prior to this race. I was devastated and cried most of the way home. This was my first race back at it and it was the worst race I had ever done. Hell, it was the worst RUN I had ever done. I felt pathetic at best and while I typically despise self-pity, I definitely wallowed in it for about 24 hours.
However, there are bright and shiny moments to this gloomy day:
My sister, who finished 6 minutes ahead of me, came back to get me so we could cross together. It was the kindest thing that I can remember someone doing for me in quite some time. My family is supportive and my sister is a shining example of that. My heart swelled so much and I swear to you I almost cried right there.
Also, there was a kid’s dash:
Henry got to run and he did quite well. Of course they do not time the kids’ dashes, but I would not have cared if he was dead last. I was super proud.
And so that is where we are right now. I am very much training for a half-marathon as we speak. I am also going to start going to Title boxing as well for cross-training. I had meant to start going a couple of weeks ago, but I decided I needed to get back in the habit of JUST running before adding in something else. If you stuck around for this whole post, thanks. I appreciate it. Tomorrow I will begin posting more “normal” posts, but today I will leave you with this:
The Ragged Running Mommy 